As I sit here on New Year's Day in our little cabin outside of Asheville, NC, I cannot help but be somewhat reflective. I mean I have all the ingredients for a nice dose of reflection. I am secluded and away on vacation in a secluded area. It is too cold and snowy to go out. I am sitting by a fireplace in a quiet room with only my own thoughts. What would happen if only I got more opportunities like this?
Today is the start of another year. This brings about lots of thoughts and ideas about how to improve next year. It brings about memories of what happened last year. I love all the count down shows that come on. I like watching them because often I don't even remember all the things that have happened. I enjoy reflecting and wish I took the time to do it more often.
2009 was an interesting year. Work was probably my hardest challenge. And notice I said that even though this was my first full ear being married, which was not as challenging to say the least. Now don't get me wrong...it was challenging at times, but work was the heavy hitter this year. I experienced a lot of changes as I have worked in three different programs in 2009. I also lost several coworkers due to changes and layoffs. I saw many children come and go. My hope is that something I brought to the table with them will help them at some point.
Yet more than this year, I began thinking about how we are entering a new decade. That got me reminiscing about all that has happened in the last ten years of the last decade. And it is a lot. I am not even sure I could capture it all. I went from being in high school to being a full time employee with two degrees and a counseling license. So here is my list of things that stand out to me over the last decade:
-I graduated high school.
-I experienced my father going through alcohol rehabilitaiton.
-I went to college, moving to Rock Hill to attend Winthrop.
-I almost lost my grandmother, but she survived and is still with us today.
-I graduated college.
-I moved to Columbia, SC and began working a full time job while in graduate school.
-I lost my father.
-I lost my grandfather.
-I went to Indonesia and Singapore on two trips over two summers.
-I graduated with my master's.
-I began dating my husband, got engaged, and got married.
-I began my first full time counseling job at Epworth Children's Home.
-I moved to Charleston.
-I began working at CYDC.
-I began running and have run several 5k's.
There are so many other important bullets that go in there. Those are just the broad bullet points. In the last ten years, I have made some of the most wonderful friends a person could ever have. In losing loved ones, I have also experienced other friends losing loved ones. Nothing can quite compare to the feeling of loss. But through it all, I cannot begin to describe or put into words how much I grew in my relationship with God. I cannot begin to share how much God was orchestrating and there in each and every step of that 10 year journey. Looking back, I can see ways beyond of a shadow of a doubt that God provided for me. He provided financially and emotionally. So in reflecting, it makes me realize how true the verse Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to give you a hope and a future," is.
I remember sitting in my old room at my parents old house prior to leaving for college and in the midst of trials with my father. I sat journaling and bawling my eyes out not knowing how it would work out for me to go to college and be ok on my own. I often had these cry sessions with God throughout this 10 year journey. Yet in reflecting, I can see how He undoubtedly and lavishly provided for me, His child. I am living proof of that verse and that God provides. So now in the midst of another period of uncertainty in my life....again I cling to that verse and my Savior's promises. And with that I can confidently say that despite not knowig exactly what my future looks like, I know who does and He has not disappointed me thus far...so I cling to Him and His promises in this next decade.
